Tiredness is between
shrugged shoulders
crushed in
the 6pm metro, carrying
tomorrow's work
home tonight.
But then somedays,
tiredness is in
the next morning
waiting 5 mins. for a bus
to school
but then, also in
waiting another 5
for the next one
to arrive
with a seat
left to occupy.
But see, tiredness tries.
It really tries
to fit inside
this 9th grade guy
who travels
an hour
E X T R A
in the bus
to see this girl get recieved
by her boy
at a stop
closer to this bar
that I was talking about.
I really like how simple and clean the poem is! Love how in just a few lines, you're able to capture the tiresome routines of city life in general as well as the protagonist's private life.
ReplyDeleteJust a suggestion, but maybe you could try to change the phrase 'girl get received' to something which suggests a little more warmth/love.