The Conflict

It has been my experience,
deeper into the ocean I’ve poised
to plunge my feet, farther inland
I’ve been hurled by the waves,
left to make sense of the maze
that always ends at the same place.
more the number of cities I traveled
to more, I felt, the conflict between who
I am and who I am supposed to be.
and then from somewhere
like the sun out from under the thick cover
of clouds, you appeared,
an inexplicable cosmic medicine, answer
to all the questions that festered
in me like an untreatable disease.
the whole of all the parts I had lost
over the time, you cut the wires
that I used to trip upon

and fear subsided as you lit up
every lamppost I passed on,
with you I rediscovered
treasures of life that lay invisible 

right beneath, where I stood.

But now,
they are gone

and you are gone too,

I am spiraling 
in an endless conflict again, albeit
a different one,

Is it you
who I’ve lost
or myself?